Quick Takes


    Some surprises in the NBA and NHL playoffs. The Pistons let the Celtics off the home court hook in game three, and they’ll pay for it. The Penguins were totally shut out in two games in Detroit; that was the biggest surprise. What the Lakers are doing to the Spurs is no surprise.  


    Max McGee caught the first touchdown pass and scored the first points in Super Bowl history in 1967, in a game he expected to watch from the sideline. When it was over, McGee had caught seven passes for 138 yards and two touchdowns. Green Bay, coached by Vince Lombardi, defeated Kansas City, 35-10. McGee had only four receptions for 91 yards during the entire 1966 regular season. He did not plan to play in the title game against the Chiefs because he violated the team curfew and spent the night before partying. But Boyd Dowler separated a shoulder on the Packers’ second drive, and Lombardi summoned McGee. He had to borrow a helmet because he left his in the locker room. A few plays later, McGee made a one-handed snare of a pass from Bart Starr and ran 37 yards to score.

    I remember it very well, and thanks to Jonathan Krost for his e-mail re: the above. What surprised me then was that the Packers didn’t make it a more lopsided win than it was. Had Pete Rozelle had his way, they would have; the commissioner’s disdain for the AFL was well known (in his NFL inner-circles) although not blatantly advertised.


    There are only four players in NBA history who have compiled 20,000 points, 10,000 rebounds and 4,000 assists; Wilt Chamberlain, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Karl Malone and Charles Barkley. But Wynn Las Vegas was not impressed. They recently sued Barkley, 45, in Nevada state court for the $400,000 he owed them for gambling debts. Barkley paid the $400,000; a prosecutor and hotel official have confirmed same.


    Charles Barkley should find another hobby. How about women? It’s a lot more fun and a lot less expensive. The latter is true as long as your brain is one of the two body parts you use.


Story of the Week


Deacon Jones: "I'm the best defensive end around. I'd hate to have to play against me."


Will Allen, then at Syracuse University, upon being introduced to Hall of Famer Lynn Swann and being told that Swann was one of the greatest wide receivers in NFL history said: "And what team did you play for?"


Craig Kilborn, CBS late-night television host, commenting on how crass Janet Jackson's halftime incident was during Super Bowl XXXVIII: "It was so crass and so sleazy that Fox television is launching its own investigation as to why they didn't do it first."


William "The Refrigerator" Perry: "I've been big ever since I was little."


Howard Cosell: “Sports is the toy department of human life. And Monday Night Football is the largest attraction in the toy department."


Dick Butkus: "I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important — like a league game or something."


Jim Finks, when asked after a loss what he thought of the officiating: "I'm not allowed to comment on lousy referees."


Terrell Owens, then of the San Francisco 49ers, was asked for one word to describe himself. He said "confident." When asked for another word he said "very."


Don Meredith: “If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, we’d all have a merry Christmas.”


Frank Gifford: "Pro Football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors."


Alex Karras: “I’m not dropping a bar of soap in the shower near Garo Yepremian.”


Howard Cosell: “The importance that our society attaches to sport is incredible. The people of this country have allowed football to get completely out of hand, and that’s fortunate for my bank account.”


Big Daddy Lipscomb: "I just wrap my arms around the whole backfield and peel 'em one by one until I get to the ball carrier. Him I keep."


Heywood Hale Broun: "Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it."


Lou Groza, NFL Hall of Fame kicker: "Old place-kickers never die. They just go on missing the point."


Steve Henderson: "I'd catch a punt naked, in the snow, in Buffalo, for a chance to play in the NFL."


Phyllis Diller: "The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public."


George Rogers: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."


Doug Plank: "Most football teams are temperamental. That's 90% temper and 10% mental."


Deion Sanders, commenting on the troubled Randy Moss, then of the Minnesota Vikings: "He's like a beautiful woman who can't cook, doesn't want to clean and doesn't want to take care of the kids. You really don't want her, but she's so beautiful that you can't let her go."


Jay Leno, commenting on the NCAA plans to launch an anti-gambling campaign: “The best way to reach college athletes is the cartoon network."


Elbert Hubbard: “College football is a sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture.”


Duffy Daugherty: “Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.”


Irv Lippel: “Duffy Daugherty is partially correct. Dancing is a contact sport, but not the best one. Sex is the best one, and all players can score, and maybe even at the same time if they’re lucky.”


Last Week’s Trivia


    I should be fired from this website for gross incompetence. That won’t happen, but only because I own this website.

    My question last week was: “98 MLB players have hit a home run in their very first AB. Only one has made it to the Baseball Hall of Fame. Who?”

    Actually, there have been two, as Dennis Cler pointed out to me. I overlooked Earl Averill, an outfielder who did it in 1929 as a Cleveland Indian.  

    Now for the player I remembered to be the only one. Famous knuckleball pitcher Hoyt Wilhelm did it with the New York Giants in 1952. Wilhelm spent 21 years in MLB. The irony is not only the fact that a pitcher did it, but Wilhelm never hit another home run during those 21 MLB seasons.


Trivia Question of the Week


    Buffalo once had a NBA team. What happened to the Buffalo Braves? See next week’s Sports Junkie for the answer.